In a world where instant responses to messages are possible, it can be especially frustrating when, after several days, you’re still waiting for a response on a time-sensitive issue. Many of us have experienced this before: asking an adviser a question, checking with a teammate if they’ve completed their tasks, and so on. Yet even with conventional wisdom on how to receive a response (crafting a compelling subject line, personalizing a message, or keeping an email short and sweet), responses can be elusive.
The truth is, the people we work with as students, researchers, or employees often have busy schedules. They may have several responsibilities vying for their attention, and sometimes an email just falls lower on their list of priorities. We want to resolve our questions and continue making progress as quickly as possible, yet help does not always come that quickly. In this article, I share key tips I’ve learned through discussions with my managers, colleagues, and advisers over the course of my time as a student and working in industry.
Sometimes, we feel overwhelmed because of the ambiguity surrounding an issue before us. I typically find a few questions most helpful in bringing clarity, which I’ve posed through the following tips:
Tip #1: Break down ambiguity and solidify your understanding of the problem.
First, what do I know and what are the questions I have? Taking fifteen minutes to break down the problem itself tells me what I don’t need to ask, what I can search up or try on my own first, and what the lingering questions I still have are. It also helps me gauge whether those remaining questions are high priority or not: if I’m having trouble understanding a concept key to the task at hand, I should reach out to a mentor or teammate. But if it’s not pertinent, I keep it in my list of questions to return to at a later time.
At the start of my second summer as a Software Development Engineering Intern at Amazon, my manager told me the team felt confident that I would be able to take on a more ambiguous project. Aside from a goal of what to accomplish (find a significantly lower cost alternative to an Amazon Web Service we were using in a system), there were no requirements or suggested design choices laid out in front of me. In scenarios like this, it can be hard to figure out where to even start asking questions. However, you often find that a natural trajectory of questions arises. As an example, a chain of questions could be:
A sign of having successfully broken down ambiguity via the first tip is if you can say yes to, can I clearly articulate my current understanding as well as my question(s) to a mentor or teammate?
Tip #2: Clarify how they can best help you.
The goal is to make it as clear as possible to the person you’re contacting how they can best help you. There are two suggestions I find helpful here.
Start by asking, how much of this person’s time and attention do I need? Is this a question I just need a short answer from, making it suitable for an email or Slack message? Am I having trouble understanding a concept and want to take 20 minutes with my professor to go over it on a whiteboard, making it suitable for office hours? This clarifies the avenue of asking questions, whether it be via message or in-person, and is information you can highlight in your communication.
If the issue is time-sensitive but not immediate, set a date you’d like a response by. You can mention the deadline you have coming up, and state when you would like an answer from them by. The key here is to be respectful of the other person’s time, but also be firm so that you can continue making progress and get the information you need in a timely manner. If you still have not received a response after the date you specified, you can feel comfortable with sending a follow-up message. Even if you didn’t include a date in your first email, you can still add that date when following up.
Tip #3: Remember that most people love to share knowledge and help others.
Some of the best advice I received from my manager this summer was creating a mindset shift and remembering that people like sharing knowledge and helping others. I think this is especially successful because it humanizes the person we may be frustrated with. Instead of growing irritated or angry with not receiving a response, this tip directs our attention toward a more productive mindset, reminding us to be empathetic and continue to put in our best effort at clear, polite communication.
Because every situation has its own nuance, there can be high variability when it comes to what approaches we choose to adopt to resolve a problem. However, these tips have been suggested by several people I’ve worked with and are tried-and-tested through my own experience. I hope these suggestions aid you as a student, in research, and in your career. If you have any other tips you would like to share, please don’t hesitate to email me at alexiswu@princeton.edu—I’m excited to hear from you!
— Alexis Wu, Engineering Correspondent
